Monday, March 31, 2008

Looking for luck

Tonight I used up the last of our store-bought fortune cookies for an after-dinner treat. All of them had the standard "apply me to area of your life that would make sense" saying on them except two. Matthew was the lucky one tonight and had two fortunes inside his cookie...Hint #1 that someone was having an off day at the cookie factory. Hint #2: The fortune. What in the world; did they sit around in a 'twiddle your thumbs' meeting on the day these lovely fortunes were put to paper?
I can see it now...the executives called a brainstorming meeting and all the employees tried to think of great, generic catchphrases that would suit the bosses. But every once in awhile someone would slide one in and it would make it through, all the way to the cookie floor. I have decided this was the birthplace of Matthew's fortunes.
Jokester Jim was having a slow brain day so he just starting thinking of his day thus far. Hmmm...the color purple looks really good on Sally today so let's write "Focus on the color purple this week and you will find good luck" (one of the fortunes) I think Jokester Jim had the hots for Sally so he was going to focus on her for the week and hope to find luck for himself. Then my favorite "Let another car cut in front of you today" I'm thinking Jokester Jim was a little slow on the reaction time during his morning commute and had a few cars cut in front of him. But thankfully he was able to spin that into something positive for himself. Good for Jim.
After those in-depth, thought provoking fortunes I think I will find a purple car today and let it cut in front of me. I am sure to be destined for good luck.

Thursday, March 27, 2008

Signs, Signs, Everywhere there's signs

I walked down the hall today to find several signs taped up on the doors. One read "famle meding"; that would be "Family Meeting" to those of you who aren't fluent in kindergarten-phonic spelling. He decided we needed to have a meeting about being mean to each other and if you are mean to each other you won't make friends. Hmm...did someone's class have a visitor from the counselor today?
And then I found the pictured sign on the door to the boys' room. "No girls allowed...only Mom." Because you know, moms aren't girls. I like to think that I'm allowed because I'm too cool to be grouped in with the cootie-carrying girls. Yes, that has to be it; at least that will make me sleep better at night.
Part of me doesn't want him to learn anymore because I think his phonic spelling signs and papers are too cute. One day he wrote "My mom is very very very to nise." But my all time favorite... While writing sentences for homework Matthew showed his work to Dad. I heard hubby laughing and say "go show Mom". He came to me and told me he wrote "when is lunch?" I looked at the paper and it read "wine is lush?" I couldn't control the laughter.

Monday, March 17, 2008

Mismatch

Issuing an APB for a size 13.5 Reebok shoe, blue with silver accents, stretchy laces, as dirty as a 5 year old can possibly make it with red mud hardened in the tread.
Somehow in our huge (HA!) house we have lost Matthew's shoe... OR Matthew has lost his shoe. He retreated to the shower last night with both of them on (I'm assuming) and this morning only one shoe was found at the scene. The other must be a victim of the Silent Reebok Sneak, now known simply as SRS. He's been known to snatch in the past and not only from our family either!
To solve our SRS attack, Matthew hobbled around with one shoe on and one off for several minutes, then the searching came to an end. I was waiting with them for the bus and looked down to find my son with a Reebok on one foot and a brown church shoe on the other foot. "What in the world do you have on your feet, son?!" He smiled and said he couldn't find the other shoe so this was the best solution. I quickly grabbed the other brown shoe so he had two matching feet and off to school he went.
The SRS still hasn't returned the missing shoe.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Collision

Just so you know...
A 5 year old daredevil on a bike running into a stationary 'Mom on a bike' has the same feeling of impact as a SUV running into a stopped VW Beetle.
He smashed his hand up under my seat; I flew forward and hit my legs on the front wheels while also sustaining a cut and hit on my calf and we both have sore necks just a short hour after impact. I think I will keep my eye on the daredevil and steer far, far away on the next bike ride.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

The Calf vs. the Horse

Have you ever watched a rodeo? If so, think of the calf roping event; the calf takes off running and here comes this big horse and rider sporting a revolving lasso. Run fast little calf because you are about to get lassoed.

Now, apply this analogy to my oldest son and wearing a coat. It doesn’t matter to him that it is 32 degrees outside and he as on short sleeves (because it will be 70 by the end of the day.) He will do anything possible to get to school without wearing a coat; he is most definitely his father’s son! But alas young lad, you are the calf. You take off running “coat free” and here comes the big horse and rider (Big Mama) and she catches you, ties your feet to your hands and sends you back in for a coat. I’m not sure what will happen when he gets too big to chase, eventually he won’t be a calf anymore and my horse will be too old to run.