Not Me Monday

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.
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Ever feel guilty that you skip a nightly bath time simply because you can't take one.more.minute of fighting siblings, or have a "make your own PB&J" dinner night, or maybe even think "God Bless Teachers" as your loud children run off to the bus? Well stop feeling guilty and join in on "Not Me" Monday where we can be brutally honest about our imperfections. Here we go.

I did not let the kids' backpacks sit for three weeks while they were on cycle break and then decide to clean them out the night before they went back to school. Gosh, there were probably important papers in there that should have been addressed or even study materials for the three week break. No, we decided a schooling on Iowa farmland and amusement park physics would serve them much better.

I did not buy one of my favorite foods (chocolate filled croissants) with the intention of thawing one overnight once in awhile and enjoying it in the morning with some coffee and then declare I was going on a diet and make them all in one day. Of course I did this with the intention of sharing with everyone to use up the croissants and end my temptation. I did not split one three ways for the kids and then eat the other three myself. Nope, I would never gorge myself on fat-filled chocolate croissants the night before my new diet.

I did not plan a short vacation and then come home with absolutely no pictures on my digital camera. No way, I always lug around the camera to amusement parks. The only pictures I did take on vacation would never be found solely on my cell phone.

I did not attend a culinary class with Emily and then proceed to tell the entire audience that cilantro tastes like soap while the chef threw it into the white chili. Gosh, that would be rude!

While walking through a cave, I did not have my wonderful (taller) husband walk in front of me so if a bat flew down the corridor it would hit him and not myself.

After two days of amusement park fun I did not park myself in a heavenly bakery with a magazine, sticky bun and a coke and let my husband run the roller coaster round with the kids one more time.

And lastly-
It was certainly not my child you might have seen vomiting in Panera this weekend and I certainly did not stand there next to him feeling all of a sudden paralyzed and not sure what to do. Also, I did not position my other children around it to try and hide the fact that there was vomit on the floor only 2 feet away from where someone was eating. Boy, if you could have seen the looks...OK, if you did see the looks, please tell me they weren't that bad because I never actually looked at anyone because I had the "swine flu stare down" fears and refused to look up. (Thankfully, Jacob really doesn't have the swine flu, just a terrible migraine and also a HUGE thank you to the wonderful customer who saw my paralyzed self and came and covered up the specimen with napkins.)